So #fivewordstoruinadate is trending on the Twitterverse. I’ve seen a couple come through my timeline and the funniest so far is “I’ve never watched Star Trek?” That would certainly be a game changer. Now, since I’ve been happily married to Mrs. Greenbean before the invention of the wheel, I don’t have much experience with dating anymore. That’s a good thing.
I did, however, come up with a couple of zingers–although I didn’t tweet them because as an old married man who doesn’t date I think it would be creepy. But here are mine.
Doctor says its a fungus #fivewordstoruinadate
Gotta ask the probation officer #fivewordstoruinadate
Okay, I said it had been awhile since I’ve dated. However, one thing I do know a lot about is preaching. In many ways preaching can be like being on a date–every word is closely scrutinized and can be understood differently by the hearer than what the speaker intended. So, here are some five words to ruin a sermon.
1. Now for my fifth conclusion #fivewordstoruinasermon
2. I heard it on FOXnews #fivewordstoruinasermon
3. Todays sermon will run long #fivewordstoruinasermon
4. Stop thinking and just listen #fivewordstoruinasermon
5. We don’t need no hermeneutics #fivewordstoruinasermon
6. Its all Greek to me #fivewordstoruinasermon
7. Jesus told me you should #fivewordstoruinasermon
8. Joel Osteen is the greatest #fivewordstoruinasermon
9. Here is a denominational video #fivewordstoruinasermon
10. Now, for my vacation pictures #fivewordstoruinasermon
7 responses to “#FIVEWORDSTORUINASERMON”
#5 favorite … I ain’t eating no homny neither!!!
well said keith–thanks for reading and commenting.
Whew! I may have been guilty of #6 (because I have a minor in bad jokes) and #9 (but not necessarily in those words), and maybe #2 (but only to then undercut Fox style triumphalism). I was really afraid you were just going to use quotes from my sermons!
no way matt–you’re silver-tongued excellence is only exceeded by your pastoral charisma.
This just came to me.
that’s a great one–because after saying that, the 20 minutes are nothing more than bilge and thinking out loud. thanks for reading and sharing!
I got in on the action over on the Twitterverse myself:
And here’s one that just came to me for #FiveWordsToRuinASermon: Open your Bibles to Thomas.