If our COVID Chronicles had sponsorship — like football stadiums and television shows, today’s intriguing story from Joseph Courtemanche would be sponsored by Alex Jones. Bet on it.

Imagine every crackpot lunacy inspired conspiracy theory about COVID-19 put in a blender, pureed, sprinkled with a hint of Dr. Strangelove on top, then served over a bed of congealed paranoia. If you could imagine such a thing, you’d have “We have Four Options.”

Thankfully, this is fiction. As are all of our stories — allegories, romances, thrillers — fiction designed to help you pass the time during the COVID-19 quarantine.

Click on the picture of Mr. Insanity himself, Alex Jones, to read Courtemanche’s story.