Today is Super Tuesday–which means something very specific for political junkies. This is the day when 10 states will conduct primaries for the presidential contest. Super Tuesday is always the day in which the most states have contests. This year, only Republicans are engaged in the process. Last year Super Tuesday was headlined primarily by then Senators Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. I love this kind of stuff–not because of my preferences in politics, but I just find it interesting. My overall feeling is that today’s contests will not change much. The only thing that might be interesting is, that if New Gingrich loses Georgia, I think he will get out of the race. Now, keep in mind I’ve been predicting that for a while, so, what do I know?
This morning as I got ready for work, I thought about the funny name “Super Tuesday” and how, in alternate universes, it might mean completely other things. If there were a parallel world where things were almost like they are for us, but not quite, what might Super Tuesday be? Well . . .
1. Super Tuesday could be the way people in a parallel universe handle the quarter day bonus in the earth’s rotation around the sun. So, instead of having a leap year with a February 29 every four years, in this parallel world there is an extra Tuesday every four years in the week before Easter. This extra Tuesday has no numerical date or month assigned. So if Easter is April 8 (as it is in our universe this year) then the Tuesday before, the regular Tuesday before, the date is April 3. The next day though, is Super Tuesday, and then the next day is Wednesday, April 4. Three days, but only two count on the calendar.
2. A second parallel universe scenario could include a sociological issue. In this world, Super Tuesday occurs whenever a Tuesday is the 5th Tuesday in a month and it follows within a month of a lunar eclipse, and the year is an even number. That is a Super Tuesday. On this Super Tuesday all debts are erased, all non-violent prisoners are released, and all oaths are revoked (this includes military obligations but does not include marital vows). Super Tuesday works a lot like the ancient Hebrew concept of “Jubilee” year.
3. One more Super Tuesday parallel universe. In this world Super Tuesday is personal for each individual. A person may declare their own Super Tuesday for any Tuesday after their 21st birthday but before their 50th birthday. A person may claim only one Super Tuesday in their adult life. On this Super Tuesday, publicly declared at least two weeks in advance, a person is allowed to say anything about anyone or anything or do anything (except physical harm or damage to property) and come Wednesday it cannot be held against her or him either legally, morally, or personally.
I’d be interested to hear other people’s ideas for Bizarro Super Tuesday.
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